Armando de la O

Reverend Orlando Moonpie

"Irreverent, Reflective, Peaceful, Raucous, Freewheeling, Playful, Witty, Manic, Hypnotic, Stylish, Literate, Carefree, Wry, Fiery, Visceral, Cathartic, Reckless and Ornate."

It’s so true. 

I hate to shave and I hate to have bushy facial hair.

I bought one of these:
 
                               
And now I look like this:

All the time.

(I’ve always had the glasses and jacket, though.)

I want to be the first comic to do a 20 minute set on the moon. My first joke will be: "So. Anyone here from out of town?"

Then a bit that starts: "So what’s the deal with cosmic microwave background radiation?" 

Some crowd work: "Hey, nice face. Where did you get it? The Crab Nebula?" 

My friends say that I should dream big and shoot for Neptune, but I think my humor is better suited to the inner planets. 

That’s what I love about humans, they don’t overreact.

…please excuse the font size problem. We are working on a solution for you. Please remain calm.

…that sounds like something a mom would say right before she attacks with a wire hanger:

"Clean teeth are happy teeth."

It also sounds a little scary if you say it out loud over and over in a semi-high pitched voice. Think Munchkin and the take it down a few notches. Good.

Is havoc the only thing one can wreak? I never hear of anyone who wreaks happiness.

Vampires are a tough and resilient people.

My biological comedic clock is ticking.

That really made me think…about how terrible it was.